Beyond The Impossible

Warship Ragnarok

Ever since he gained the power to transform his body into energy, Max Quantum a.k.a. has lost the ability to knock. Without thinking twice about it, he changes from radio waves to flesh and blood right inside Kari Zel’s room, asking:

<Hey Kari, do you have a minute to… Whoa! Sorry> he quickly apologizes, turning away in embarrassment when he finds the two Kari duplicates making out on the bed.

<Sure! What’s up?> a third duplicate appears out of nowhere, right in front of Max’s eyes.

<Maybe this isn’t the best moment, I see you want some privacy> he says, watching the two duplicates take off each other’s clothes.

<What for?> the third Kari asks. Sometimes her openness is endearing, other times it’s just weird.

The discussion continues on the other side of the door, which Max will surely remember to knock next time he visits.

<Any news about Vesta?> Kari asks.

<Noriko says she’s healing, but she hasn’t regained consciousness yet. I wanted to talk about what happened during our fight with Enyo.>

<You got your butts handed to you. It happens> she shrugs.

<Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it. I should’ve been able to help Vesta, but I was useless.>

<Losing a fight sucks, I know, but you were up against a war goddess, Max. Don’t blame yourself.>

<I don’t think I do. But I’ve realized one thing… Vesta is not a fighter, and neither am I. Our powers have helped us win before, but we’re going against people way stronger than us.>

<And you’re telling this to me because…?>

<You’ve trained all your life to fight people who could kill you in their sleep. Can you teach me?>

<You want to learn martial arts in a couple of weeks? You’re not Noriko, you know. But maybe I can teach you a couple of tricks that may come in handy… if you promise me one thing.>

<Anything.>

<Kick Enyo’s butt into the next galaxy the next time you see her.>

 

A nameless planet in the Hekate sector

Nobody lives here. Hekate conquered this sector from Hermes, but she didn’t care for the mortals under his rule: once she found a planet to her liking, its population stood little chance against her.

Now one of her three bodies sits on a throne of ebony built on a pile of skulls. It’s her Maiden form, a stunningly beautiful woman with raven hair and a revealing dress darker than night. The other bodies of the Triple Goddess stand at her side: the Child, a ten year old version of her, and the Crone, a decrepit old woman obscured by a dark cloak.

They’re all watching holograms of a battle happening thousands of light years away: an army of Talos robots making short work of a legion of Hekate’s witches, the reanimated corpses who serve her every whim. And the Maiden is not pleased.

<These robots are becoming a nuisance to us, sisters> she comments.

<Perhaps Hephaestus is not really dead, sister, and he comes to claim our realm> the Crone says.

<It matters not. The Triple Goddess is beyond the squabbles of these small gods> the Child adds.

<We agree. However, the children of Zeus should be taught a… what is this?> the Maiden wonders, when a line of fire appears on the floor before her. Then another, then another, until it draws a pentagon. The geometric figure shoots a column of fire, and when it dissipates two very different women have appeared: the one with red hair in a ponytail is clearly a Demon, judging by her red skin. She’s wearing a brown short leather jacket with sleeves rolled up to the elbows, left unopened to reveal a dark red top that is having a hard time covering her curves. The shorts and boots are also red, and her bare midriff shows that she doesn’t have a navel.

The human besides her couldn’t be more different. Not only she’s much shorter and with her black hair as long as her back, but even though she’s wearing sunglasses Hekate recognizes her.

<Null!!! How DARE you insult us with your presence!?> the Maiden shouts, just when the other two bodies shoot bolts of pure energy towards the intruder. Their target doesn’t budge: the Demon creates a red sword and with a single swing easily deflect the blasts, redirecting them towards the nearest wall. This causes an explosion that makes the entire temple around them shake.

<Not quite. I am Viper and this is my associate Pain. I’m here to tell you how to defeat the Talos.>

Hekate seems to be tempted to annihilate this annoying mortal, but she pauses.

<We are listening.>

<With your current strategy, it’s only a matter of time before you lose. The Talos can’t hurt you, sure, but your power has limits: you can’t defend your entire territory and certainly you can’t expand it. You’ve kept yourself out of all the latest divine wars… the fight against Eris, the formation of the Alliance… and that’s been to your advantage. But how long can you last?>

<We are not hearing reasons for allowing your life to continue.>

<I’ll get to the point. The Talos follow the orders of Galatea, the former robotic mistress of Hephaestus. I can give you the location of her headquarters and a way to disable her.>

<There is a saying on Olympus: beware of mortals bearing gifts. Why should we trust you?>

<I want something in Galatea’s vault, something that Null discovered when she scanned the database of the Vulcan Forge. That’s my price for helping you.>

<The Triple Goddess does not run errands. Why not ask your pet Demon for help?>

<Because Demons aren’t invulnerable and I’m working with limited resources. Besides, if you want to get revenge on Null for interfering with your plans, this is your best chance.>

<Is that so. Then we accept your offer, Viper.>

 

Warship Ragnarok

There’s not much to do for Todd Slate on the ship: he decided to join the adventure to see a side of his girlfriend that she rarely shows, but she’s always too busy to talk to him.

He finds her in her quarters… their quarters for the duration of the trip… sitting on the bed, in her everyday clothes with just the boots off, even though it’s supposed to be late night; she’s watching two holographic screens, one with footage of a Lampyrian woman and another with several graphs he can’t even begin to understand.

<I thought we were following New York’s time zone> he tells her.

<You can sleep if you want to. I’m not tired> she answers. He kisses her neck, but she’s almost too focused on her work to notice. He sits next to her and asks:

<So, uhm, “Loki” told me we’ve changed course after we dropped off Ulysses. Why?>

<I don’t want to risk going into Artemis territory with Vesta still injured. We’re skipping directly to Labya, maybe Aphrodite can help her heal faster.>

<Cool. I’m really looking forward to meet her.>

Noriko turns her head, giving him a death stare. He’s very quick to change the subject.

<So that was really THE Ulysses, right? He seems like a cool guy.>

<I don’t trust him. He has his own agenda and I haven’t really figured out what it is. >

<Is it always like this when you’re in space? Watching your back even from your allies?>

<Pretty much. >

<What are you working on? Is that Lysia?> Todd asks, pointing at the blue alien in the screen; there’s a freeze frame when the golden Ankh symbol on her arm glows.

<Yes. Her Infinity Key allowed her to control Drylon technology, to some extent at least; I’m looking through every data I have on her to figure out how it might have worked.>

<Is that even possible? I mean, it’s clearly made by gods right?>

<It doesn’t mean it can’t be reverse engineered; remember, there’s no such thing as magic, just incredibly advanced technology. We know Drylon devices can only be used if they determine the user to be a member of the Drylon species, the Infinity Key is just quicker and more reliable than any other method we know. If I figure out why, maybe I can replicate the results.>

<That sounds… ambitious. Can I help you with anything?>

<I could use some coffee> she answers, keeping her attention on the screen. She then turns it off.

<I’m sorry, that was cold. I’m afraid I’m not feeling particularly romantic, not with one of my friends comatose in the next room and a war goddess on our tracks.>

<No, I understand this is important. I’ll just keep you company, I enjoy watching you work.>

<Okay now you’re making me feel guilty about not feeling romantic…>

 

Nysa, 17.000 light-years from Earth

When the Guild was in charge of this sector, this was a hedonist’s paradise. The planet has no means to sustain its population, since everything is devoted to the pursuit of pleasure. Even those who were not killed by the Heart Of The Universe’s blast have died of drug overdose or starvation.

The latter is a clear indication of how this planet has been mismanaged: there used to be a vineyard the size of Australia, but none of the grapes have been used to feed mortals. Now most of it has been ravished by wildfires, but beneath the surface there is still a cellar that holds enough alcohol to supply all bars in North America for a decade. Or Dionysus for a week.

There’s a drunkard laying on the floor, licking the wine spilled days ago. He didn’t stop the first time the glass cut his tongue, but when a fire pentagram appears and delivers two women on the scene he crawls towards the shortest one.

<Buy me a drink, beautiful? I’ll show you a good time> he offers, drooling over Viper’s pants.

The second he tries to grope her, Pain’s sword cuts off his hand. He inhales to scream, but he can’t: Pain has already turned the sword into a knife and sliced his throat off, removing his vocal cords.

<Let’s get this over quickly. I feel like I need a tetanus shot just by breathing here> Viper complains, stepping over the drunkard’s corpse to get closer to the nearest bottle.

<You don’t need to shoot this Tetanus. Tell me who he is and I will kill him myself> Pain says.

<I have to say, Pain, even for a bloodthirsty demon you do have a one track mind. Get me that blasted bottle and don’t damage it> Viper orders her, when she realizes she’s too short to reach the top shelf where there’s one of the very few unopened bottles. When Pain gets hold of it, however, the bottle flies away from her hands.

<Hold it right there! Nobody steals from Dionysus!> someone boasts, right before burping.

He grabs the bottle and opens it with one hand, which is both impressive and necessary since the other one is busy. Viper looks away: Dionysus is drinking straight from the bottle while he’s urinating against the wall. He’s also very naked and very drunk.

<The things I do to conquer the universe> she sighs.

<Ah, that was a nice year, whatever it was> Dionysus says, throwing the already empty bottle behind his back. He stumbles towards Viper; Pain puts herself between the two, drawing her sword.

<I don’t know you, red t#ts. But she’s cute. She reminds me of what’s her name, Athena’s groupie.>

<I am Viper. Do you mind putting some pants on?>

<I don’t answer t’you, cutie. I do what’ver I want> Dionysus boasts, scratching his groin.

<Clearly we are dealing with a superior being> Pain deadpans.

<I bet you want revenge on Null, Dionysus, for destroying the Guild. I can help you with that.>

<Hmm, I dunno. It sounds like too much work.>

<What if I told you that you don’t have to do anything, except give her a big party?>

<Sure, I’m down to f##k her> he answers, teleporting a bottle in his hands and preparing to open it.

<NOT what I had in mind> Viper stops him, trying to take away the bottle. Dionysus doesn’t react well, grabbing her arm and holding her tight. His tone changes, with drunkenness replaced by lust.

<I SAID I do what I WANT. And right now I want to f##k Null’s brains out.>

<Leave her or you’ll be the goddess of wine> Pain threatens him, and not just with words: there are two very sharp axes between his legs, ready to cut at a moment’s notice. Dionysus licks Viper’s cheek before letting her go, even leaving the bottle in her hands.

<I’m in, cutie. But don’t cross me… I can be a MEAN drunk.>

<I’ll keep that in mind. I’ll be in touch, Dionysus> Viper says, looking forward to burn her clothes.