Beyond The Impossible

Null Island, Pacific Ocean

Laceration is near the shore, knee deep in the ocean, exercising her use of the energy whip.

Her father Torn is watching her from a distance, in silence. He doesn’t acknowledge the arrival of Noriko Null, uncharacteristically wearing a tank top and shorts. She sits next to him, applying lotion on a sunburned nose.

<Isn’t it a little too hot for a trench coat?> she finally asks.

<It’s a duster.>

<Ah, well, that’s different. Perfect beach attire, then.>

More silence. Noriko has learned to never wait for him to break the ice.

<How long have we known each other, Torn?>

<A while.>

<And you never told me you had a daughter. Anyone else I should know about?>

<Wife. A younger daughter.>

<Of course. You know we’re about to launch an attack on Hephaestus, right?>

<Kari told me.>

<When we’re done, I’ll understand if you want to go home with your daughter.>

<She can’t go home without me. And I can’t go home until I’ve accomplished the mission.>

<What mission?>

<I can’t tell you.>

<Why not?>

<I can’t tell you.>

<Dammit, Torn, what do I have to do to earn your trust?>

<It is not a matter of trust. I have responsibilities towards my people.>

<Torn, I consider you a friend, but you’re the most stubborn and frustrating person I know. Don’t you understand that I want to help you, but I can’t unless you let me help you?>

Torn looks in the distance, at his daughter. His facial expression is inscrutable, as always, but there’s something in his voice. Nostalgia? Guilt?

<My people value neutrality above all else, Null. We don’t involve ourselves in the affairs of other beings, whether they are men or gods.>

<Says the guy who helped me overthrow and kill Demeter.>

<I will stand besides you in battle, Null, as I have done before. But I’ll follow the will of my people.>

<Really. What does Laceration think about this?>

<She’s just a child.>

<She says she’s sixty years old.>

<In Demon years, a child. We’re not immortal, but we age slowly.>

<And yet, she’s old enough to chase you across the galaxy. Why was she looking for you, Torn?>

<Ten years ago I received orders to return to Hell.>

Noriko’s only reaction is to raise an eyebrow.

<That’s the name of my planet> Torn clarifies.

<Of course it is.>

<I refused. My mission was not complete. When Laceration became old enough to leave the planet, she was sent to get me back.>

<So what’s the problem? Just follow her and go back to your wife and kids.>

<I can’t.>

<Because of the mission?>

<Because I broke my vows of neutrality too many times. If I go back to Hell, I will be executed.>

<Just send her back, then!>

<If she returns without me or without my head, then she will be executed.>

<Y’know Torn, I’m starting to think your planet really sucks.>

<It’s not called Hell just because it’s hot> someone else says.

Torn creates a sword and uses it to attack the intruder, but he misses him completely.

<Careful with that thing, you might hurt somebody. Definitely not me, but…>

<Do you even understand the concept of privacy, Hermes?> Noriko complains, exasperated.

<I just wanted to tell you that everything’s good to go, sunshine.>

<Already? It’s only been a few hours!>

<Well, I don’t like to brag, although you’ve seen with your own eyes that I have every right to, but I am the supreme ruler of 753 worlds. I can pull a few strings.>

<Alright then. Let me get in touch with the others> Noriko says, reaching for her purse.

<No need for that> the god stops her, snapping his fingers.

 

Solar system asteroid belt, 400 million miles from Earth

A fraction of a second later, Noriko and Torn are on the bridge of the Supreme Scorpion, the pirate spaceship they recovered months earlier. They are not alone.

Vesta is there, along with Kari’s original body and Quantum in civilian clothes. Lysia is there, along with Bob Null. The latter two are completely naked.

<Oh God> Noriko comments, covering her eyes after becoming redder than Torn.

<Honey, it’s not what…well I guess it is what it looks like> Bob comments, covering himself with his hands. Lysia doesn’t bother to do the same.

<Activate modesty mode> Noriko orders. The N-phone in her purse projects holographic black bars to provide strategic cover both for her father and his latest conquest.

<Spoilsport> Kari teases her.

<Hello everybody. I don’t believe I’ve met all of you, so allow me to introduce myself: I am Hermes, the most clever and handsome son of Zeus. God of tricksters, travelers, traders and…>

<Just get on with it> Noriko pushes him, still avoiding eye contact with her father.

Hermes takes the center of an imaginary stage, where he begins to illustrate his plan with the help of a holographic representation of the Milky Way Galaxy.

<This is the Hephaestus Collective, the area of space under his control. As you can see, in the past months he’s annexed most of the territory previously held by Artemis and Demeter, as well as considerable parts of space once belonging to Dionysus, Persephone and even to me.>

<Myridia is still in your territory> Kari notes with relief.

<And he hasn’t touched Aphrodite’s sectors> Vesta highlights.

<Both literally and figuratively, if you know what I mean> Hermes quips.

<So he doesn’t have the Stargate we found of Kythera?> Quantum asks.

<It’s not called Stargate> Lysia corrects him.

<The good news is that he now controls a fifth of the entire Olympian Galaxy> Hermes explains.

<How is that a good thing!?> Kari wonders.

<He can’t keep everything under control. His military forces are too scattered> Noriko says.

<Very good, sunshine! My dear step-brother is biting more than he can chew. The problem is, if Diana and Persephone really do form an alliance and they steal control of the Talos, they will have enough ships and robots and undead to hold half the galaxy.>

<Which is bad, we get it. So what’s the plan?> Quantum asks. Hermes points at the map:

<This is the Vulcan Forge, 2300 light-years from our current position. Every Talos can be controlled from here; essentially, the heart and soul of the Hephaestus Collective.>

<We want to blow it up> Noriko explains to the team.

<How? It’s built on the surface of a neutron star> Lysia recalls.

<I’ve recently come across a Drylon weapon that can be used to destroy any star> Hermes reveals.

<You mean you stole it> Vesta clarifies; she doesn’t know the details, but she knows her nephew.

<You may ask yourself: but Hermes, if your amazing godly powers can transport you to Earth in a second, why can’t you go to the Forge and destroy it yourself? Well, unfortunately, Hephaestus is more clever than he is ugly. He has technology that can disrupt my ability to travel beyond speed.>

<We should get some of that> Torn comments.

<I forgot you talked, mister happy face. So here’s the plan I devised with sunshine…>

<Please stop calling me that> Noriko complains.

<I will take you as close to the Forge as I can. Then you will drive this ship to the star, Null will transmit her formula to the entire Talos collective to deactivate them, and you will detonate the bomb to destroy the Forge. Its destruction will also deactivate the disruptor fields, allowing me to teleport my armies and annihilate Diana’s forces.>

<What’s my role in all this?> Lysia asks.

<Since the bomb is Drylon technology, it must be initialized before it can be used. I could get a pregnant human to do it, but as romantic as that may be, your Infinity Key is more reliable.>

<And what about me?> Bob questions.

<Oh, I don’t need you. I just wanted Noriko to see you naked and love me even more.>

<You’re disgusting> Noriko insults him.

<-I’m also the best hope of the galaxy.>

<I was wondering when you would give us the bad news> Kari responds.

 

Kythera, 950 light-years from Earth

Officially, the Aphrodite Queendom is neutral. The goddess of love never takes any side in any battle between her siblings, guaranteeing safe passage. There is only one rule for visiting gods: they must never harm one of Aphrodite’s subjects.

As First Concubine, Etyra is the de facto leader of this planet, and as such she should feel perfectly safe. But the one-year old Lampyrian can’t help but feel uneasy with the latest visitor.

She looks like a human girl barely out of her teenage years. Green hair, dressed in a skimpy outfit of leather and metal, with a dragon tattoo running from her cleavage to her stomach.

<So, First Fu##toy…>

<First Concubine, Queen Persephone> Etyra corrects her.

<Whatever. I’ve heard about this place. My step-sister’s personal fu##-cave. Word around the galaxy is that you had quite a few di##less visitors lately.>

<If you are referring to the Talos army, yes they were stationed here for a while. Anyone can land on Kythera and receive our hospitality.>

<Hospitality of your c##t. I know you Lampyrian sl#ts, you spread your legs for anything. No wonder Daddy and his little w##re love you so much.>

<We are grateful for the love of His Holiness Almighty Zeus> Etyra says, instinctively making a curtsey. Persephone reacts to the sign of respect towards her father by grabbing Etyra by the throat and lifting her inches from the ground; since the alien is taller than her, she has to levitate to do it.

<And I would be VERY grateful, First Fu##toy, if you told me what the Talos were doing in this sector. Grateful enough NOT to stuff a plasma grenade inside your pu##y.>

<I am a lover of Aphrodite. To hurt me is to invoke her wrath – Etyra answers.>

<Oh yeah? What’s she gonna do, scr#w me to death? I am the Queen of the Motherfu##ing Underworld, you stupid filthy w##re! Now tell me why the Talos were here or…>

<They were looking for a Drylon artifact. They don’t know that I have it> someone else answers.

Persephone unceremoniously lets Etyra fall on the floor to look at the man: seven feet tall, somewhat old for a mortal, white hair and a purple jewel embedded in his throat.

<Who the f##k are you supposed to be?>

<Thalas Khanos. Former High Geneticist of Demeter, now Oracle to both Hermes and Hephaestus.>

<You work for TWO of my enemies? You must like to be f##ked both ways, like Aphrodite, to come out and face me. You do understand that I can skullf##k this entire planet, right?>

<Hephaestus doesn’t know that I have the Drylon portal. And Hermes doesn’t know I’m here.>

<I like your style, di##head. I’ll let you live long enough to talk.>

<You are queen by marriage. I can give you the means to become a Queen on your own right.>

<It would make many of my relatives wicked jealous. But I can’t declare war on all those fu##ers.>

<That won’t be necessary. Just bring me the head of Noriko Null, and you will rule Olympus.>

<I’m listening.>